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ScottMalaysia
29 December 2007, 02:33 AM
I used a free program off the internet to determine my and my girlfriend's nakshatras. Apparently, mine is Punarvasu and hers is Vishakha. The temperament of Punarvasu is Deva (god), and that of Vishakha is Rakshasa (demon). One site said that a Rakshasa woman cannot marry a Deva man.

How important is it to be compatible for marriage? Our friend, who is very knowledgable about Hinduism, said to take it with a grain of salt and not to worry about it. But I am worried.

I love my girlfriend very much, and she loves me. I could never love anyone else or marry anyone but her. When we met, I was a Catholic, and she decided to convert. Her father wanted me to be a Hindu, so I agreed. Even if a proper astrologer said that we weren't compatible, I still want to marry her. What would happen if we got married when we weren't compatible. I know Hinduism has no 'Thou shalt not' statements and doesn't enforce any strict rules, but is it generally okay to marry someone you're not compatible with?

devotee
29 December 2007, 03:40 AM
I used a free program off the internet to determine my and my girlfriend's nakshatras. Apparently, mine is Punarvasu and hers is Vishakha. The temperament of Punarvasu is Deva (god), and that of Vishakha is Rakshasa (demon). One site said that a Rakshasa woman cannot marry a Deva man.

How important is it to be compatible for marriage? Our friend, who is very knowledgable about Hinduism, said to take it with a grain of salt and not to worry about it. But I am worried.


Don't Take Such Things Too Seriously ! The art of forcasting is too imperfect. If these were so true, all arranged marriages in India by matching Gunas would have been perfect ... which is hardly the case !!

Have faith in God & leave aside all fears. Cheer up man ! :)

yajvan
29 December 2007, 07:07 AM
Hari Om
~~~~~~

Namaste Scott,

I do not have the answer to your question but wanted to let you know the following. Considering a marriage on just the nakshatras is unwise. In Jyotish there are many more indicators that are looked at e.g. the 7th house ( relationships) the 12 house, pleasures of the bed. The Arudha of the 12 house ( called upa pada lagna), etc. etc. Then one also looks for various yogas and unions of the grahas.

A qualified jyotisha can then tell the nature of the marriage e.g. spiritual, passionate, business-like ( e.g. two families merging via the marriage of their children bringing the two families together), domestic with children, or a marriage with dosa or blemishes.So, in one area there may be strength and in another some weakness.

Like any marriage there are not only ups-and-downs, there are dasa periods that stretch for a period of time where one condition will last e.g. all happiness or spirit of co-operation, is traded in for a period of hard work, or issues, or separation ( both natural separation due to work or otherwise).

I have seen this in my life both as a grhastha (householder) and as a jyotish śișya watching other marriages unfold.

So, in conclusion, if you are motivated to look deeper into this, a qualified jyotish astrologer is wise. How do you know if he/she is qualified? By recommendations is the place to start.

The ideal jyotisha? take a look at this post: http://www.hindudharmaforums.com/showthread.php?t=1711

pranams

ScottMalaysia
30 December 2007, 02:09 AM
What if he says we're not compatible? Can we still get married? Would it be a sin? Would something bad happen to either of us? I know I couldn't love anyone else and we want to get married in the Vedic way.

ScottMalaysia
30 December 2007, 12:15 PM
I looked up another site which said that our compatibility is good, but something called manglik to do with the planet Mars is not good. She is manglik, I am not. However, there is a ceremony called kumbh vivah, where the bride "marries" a peepal tree, a banana tree or an icon of Lord Vishnu first before the acutal marriage. I hope we can do that.

What happens if two non-compatible people fall in love before they realise they aren't compatible? Do they have to separate just because of some stupid horoscope? Isn't love greater than that?

yajvan
30 December 2007, 01:45 PM
Hari Om
~~~~~

Namaste Scott,

I can see that you want to do the right thing... I cannot tell you what to do, you must make the choices on your own.

you mention,

I looked up another site which said that our compatibility is good, but something called manglik to do with the planet Mars is not good. She is manglik, I am not.

IMHO an important decision as this should not be left to a web site's recommendation, including HDF.

One thing I do know - I look to what Vasistha says to Sri Ram, the wise seeker knows - the fruit of my endeavors will be commensurate with the intensity of my self-effort and neither fate nor god can ordain otherwise. Indeed self effort alone is responsible for whatever man gets (attains) here. Yoga Vasistha Mumuksu Vyavahara ( or the behavior of the seeker) Chapt 2.7,8

Now what does this mean ? It suggests that your actions today will be rewarded accordingly and they are based upon ones self effort. Yes, the past absolutely influences today's actions and this is cast in one's birth chart ( janma kundali), yet you still have a choice + self effort to make things happen.

You will have to decide your next steps and how to proceed. If there is a temple priest you can discuss this with that would be good, or a qualified jyotishi you can see face-to-face. Just some ideas.


pranams

TatTvamAsi
22 January 2008, 08:45 PM
I used a free program off the internet to determine my and my girlfriend's nakshatras. Apparently, mine is Punarvasu and hers is Vishakha. The temperament of Punarvasu is Deva (god), and that of Vishakha is Rakshasa (demon). One site said that a Rakshasa woman cannot marry a Deva man.

How important is it to be compatible for marriage? Our friend, who is very knowledgable about Hinduism, said to take it with a grain of salt and not to worry about it. But I am worried.

I love my girlfriend very much, and she loves me. I could never love anyone else or marry anyone but her. When we met, I was a Catholic, and she decided to convert. Her father wanted me to be a Hindu, so I agreed. Even if a proper astrologer said that we weren't compatible, I still want to marry her. What would happen if we got married when we weren't compatible. I know Hinduism has no 'Thou shalt not' statements and doesn't enforce any strict rules, but is it generally okay to marry someone you're not compatible with?

hahahhahaha.. LMAO.. that's hilarious.. you didn't tell her did you? Or else you'll be sleeping on the couch for a while! ;)

on the serious side, if an astrologer shows that you two are not compatible, it would be up to you two at that point since he has labelled the risks involved. However, nowadays, it is very HARD to find a trustworthy and effective astrologer as many are quacks with a parrot and cards in the bag. Be careful before making decisions and consult several astrologers; if you start seeing patterns in their predictions, well, then you can be somewhat sure that there is some semblance of truth in what they're saying.

The ability to tap into the Aakashic records requires tremendous fortitude and devotion to the subject of Jyotisha. I would tread carefully IMO.

Best of luck.

Subham.

yajvan
23 January 2008, 10:25 AM
Hari Om
~~~~~
hahahhahaha.. LMAO.. that's hilarious.. you didn't tell her did you? Or else you'll be sleeping on the couch for a while! ;)

if an astrologer shows that you two are not compatible, it would be up to you two at that point since he has labelled the risks involved. However, nowadays, it is very HARD to find a trustworthy and effective astrologer as many are quacks with a parrot and cards in the bag.

Your qualifications on this are of great import... a qualified Jyotisha is a blessing to encounter.

What then makes an excellent Jyotisha? Perhaps this post will be some some value: http://www.hindudharmaforums.com/showthread.php?t=1711&highlight=sun


pranams