PDA

View Full Version : When I have sex I lose consciousness for 3 days!



Jack 999
23 March 2009, 11:45 AM
Hello!

I have been meditating in many manners from the age 14 onwards but now I have meditated for 4 years already in the Zen-way 4 hours every day from 03-07 and I sleep just 3 hours from 00:00 to 03:00.I am almost about 80&enlightened.But I cannot go further because when I "have" sex I lose ALL of my meditative-consciousness for at least for 3 days before I´m back to my normal level of consciousness.And when I have sex about 2 times a week, my consciouness CANT lift itself all the way to enlightenement.This kind life is very bad because I feel like my meditation is going nowhere but I do it anyway because I´m so patient.)

I dont have sex with anyone(I am still a virgin at 31 years of age because I am so much a buddhist that I think that sex is disgusting (though when I
meditate I dont find it disgusting anymore,then its just doesnt bother me
like everything else.)and also I never want lose my chance to be able to meditate better without no lust clouding my mind.),and I dont even masturbate,It just happens when I sleep.

And I do everything that anyone should do for not having sex:I eat only little,I dont do anthing "disturbing" like watch tv of play games,I dont either eat meat or smoke or drink alcohol.I eat only rise and some vegetables.I just live a very ascetic life.
--
I know that some people who meditate do practice sex but I have no idea how could I ever so do and dont know either that how can they do so.

I have always had terrible spiritual trouble with sex(When I used to masturbate when I was working in a daycare center when I was 22,I lost all of my "sensitive feelings" for the children for again about 3 days which felt horrible and disgusting because I dont want to live that kind of life.).

But at least now I know how to get rid of sex easilly:the only thing that has ever done that for me In just a few hours of meditation was Krsna Consciousness and its Krsna-Mantra meditation.In fact they are the only people in existence that can live normal lives and live in the city and still easily not to have sex.And they are not even allowed to have sex because LIKE ME it makes them come back to body-consciouness (normal consciousness) for at least a day.So I know what I have to do:I will become a Krsna-Bhakti-Monk in a few years time when I have enlightened myself first in the "Buddha-manner" if I just can(because I have meditated for so long that It is very difficult to change meditation and I also want to experience both enlightenenements because I´m so far in the Buddha-meditation.

I know that Krsna-consciouness has a very different philosophy compared
to Buddhism,but I have studied it completely and find to be the correct one
and not buddhism anymore.I even have a Krsna-master who is ready to
initate me when I am ready.

Krnsa-Bhaktis have sex,but ONLY when they reproduce and even then they
meditate.

And in Krsna-consciouseness beign a virgin is EXTREMELY important:it
gives a thousand times more clarity and concentration.

In Krsna-consciousness it is known that the monks that dont have sex live much longer and are much healthier than the ones who do(and having sex is worse for men than for women which may explain the fact that men almost always fall asleep after having sex because their body has experieced something bad).

And the same is true with "5 tibetan rites" in which even normal buddhist monks can stop having sex(if they do the 6 rite):they live almost 100-150 years and are MUCH More powerful! I have also used these 5 tibetan rites myself so that I was 2 months without having sex and at that time I was able to push my meditation to at least to 90% enlightened.And I know that if I could still be able to use the rites,in at least about 6 months I would be competely enlightened.(The reason why I can acheive enlightenment so fast is that I have been meditating many past lifes already.)

Also I think that for me not ever having sex makes me very strong spiritually even in the Buddhist manner because its easier for me to meditate without sex bothering me.
---------
In fact I know how I will be able to meditate well,I will just have to do the
5 rites again(the reason why I have not been doing them all the time is
the fact that I am also very ill in many different ways wich makes meditation and doing the rites very difficult.But I have such insane pains
because of my illnesses that only that in it self will keep me meditating
because its the only thing that makes ALL of my pains go away which
incredible when you think that I have such pains that I almost want to kill
myself!!!).
---------------------------------------------------
But my basic question is the fact that I am some kind of "freak":NO ONE
HAS EVER heard of ANYONE who HAS these kinds of troubles while meditating the buddha way:I mean even Buddha was supposed to have been able to have sex without it affecting his meditation at all!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And even in Krsna-consciouness they have never heard of anyone that has
the "bodily-consciousness" on for 3 DAYS:their furtest is just one day!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
----------------------------
I mean REALLY:most people dont even undestand my question because it
MAKES NO SENSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Thank You:Jack 999

sm78
24 March 2009, 05:36 AM
I mean REALLY:most people dont even undestand my question because it
MAKES NO SENSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Not really. Not the problem with wet dreams. I am having trouble making sense of 80% - 90% enlightenment.

But it is true that what is gained in meditation is lost in a long dreamy sleep, a bout of sex and such things.

2 points.
1. Meditational heights are not enlightenment.
2. There is no other way than to live through events of this life most of whose seed has been laid before you saw the light of the day.

izi
24 March 2009, 10:47 AM
no you shouldn't have sex if you are trying to reach a certain stage of enlightenment. some psychological treatment may be in order before endeavoring in these more difficult practices of meditation. Something that is suppressed will only rebound more strongly. So try not to do this.

If you make an appointment with a psychologist they may be willing to take into account your meditation practices and assist you in mapping a gameplan to free yourself from this misery.

Sometimes the best treatment is ordinary. At least you are willing to look at the fact you have a problem. Some people never get to that point and they inflict their suffering on others.

Sometimes acting out something freely in the mind allows it to run its course, or better yet, act it out with a willing partner.

find whatever works without harming anyone with a strong desire to change for the better. and someday you will reach enlightenment, it is always waiting for you.

Furthermore speaking from a tantric perspective, even poop is not disgusting seen from the eyes of enlightened soul. So your indication that you find sex disgusting means to me that you have not reached the peak. that is not a criticism, it is just that there is no sufering at enlightenment, and engaging in sexual relationships can cause misery.

but hey, we're human right?

I do not agree with Buddhists that Nirvana is the end, and I believe Siddhartha was an incarnation of Vishnu.

In ISKCON they have had a lot of problems with child abuse. So again suppression is not the answer. I believe tantra is better. However, certainly Krsna is probably attractive to those who feel they have a problem and can't help themselves, as Krsna is more powerful than any human organization such as ISKCON.

take it all with a grain of salt...

simex
24 March 2009, 12:02 PM
I find that it's not sex that brings me to awareness of the body/ego, but rather my attitude towards it. As long as it's something that you have anxiety over, it will continue to be a hurdle. When I had a partner who made me feel like I had to earn sex, it brought the ego in to awareness necessarily. Now that I have a partner with whom sex occurs spontaneously and effortlessly, it is not a problem, just an expression of love in the universe occurring naturally-- like all things.

I'm not a guru or anything, and I have no spiritual accolades to back up my words, but I'd like to share something I learned in the course of my practice: Whenever I thought I had found an obstacle or a stumbling block, it always turned out that the obstacle was not in fact the obstacle, but rather my anxiety over and desire for liberation / experience.

You could be giving an acceptance speech for a prestigious award, while photographers took pictures of you, and beautiful women cried your name, and have it not bring your attention to the ego, as long as you are detached from the person. Sex is small potatoes. The swan does not get wet.

Some Nisargadatta quotes:

"When you are infected with the 'I-am-the-body' virus; a whole universe springs into being. But when you have had enough of it, you cherish some fanciful ideas about liberation and pursue lines of action totally futile. You concentrate, you meditate, you torture your mind and body, you do all sorts of unnecessary things, but you miss the essential which is the elimination of the person."

"To meet all the vicissitudes of life is penance enough! You need not invent trouble. To meet cheerfully whatever life brings is all the austerity you need."

atanu
24 March 2009, 12:06 PM
Another help is to be a vegetarian, if you are already not.

Jack 999
24 March 2009, 06:11 PM
Thank You for your Answers:
In fact I am a person who is extremely romantic,so romantic that no normal
person could ever satisfy my need for hugs.But at the same time I also
have a really weak body and I look almost like a woman,so that NO girl
or a woman HAS -EVER- even looked me with anything but hate.And also
the fact that I am a buddhist means that I am too "good" for people who
want dominant "butchmen".I have tried from the age 10-25 EVERYTHING
to get me a nice girlfrind (internet,bars,at jobs),and tried to do it in every
manner but still no one has ever more than slighly intrested(and even they
all had men already).And also I am terribly sick now so that I don“t even
have almost any emotions left(one of my sicknesess is a neurological disease that has destroyed most of my brain so that I dont have more
than 40% emotions left)which also means that I couldnt even have sex
in the way that I now have it with anyone.)
So I have really bad karma wich TOTALLY makes it impossible for me to
have any sex or relationship with anyone,so meditation really is the only
thing that I have left!

-----------------------------
Furthermore speaking from a tantric perspective, even poop is not disgusting seen from the eyes of enlightened soul. So your indication that you find sex disgusting means to me that you have not reached the peak. that is not a criticism, it is just that there is no sufering at enlightenment, and engaging in sexual relationships can cause misery.
----------------------------------------------------
Thats what I said alrady in the beginning,that I DO NOT SEE SEX AS
DISGUSTING WHEN -I AM IN MEDITATIVE STATE-!!!!!!!!
But it doesn“t mean that I should do it because somehow not having sex
is causing me this meditation problem:like I said at LEAST when I will be
a Krnsna-Bhakti being a virgin ig VERY IMPORTANT!!!!! And also when
I practice the 5 tibetan rites it is also important to never had sex!!!!!




Another help is to be a vegetarian, if you are already not.
---------
Like I said it already I am a vegeterian.

atanu
24 March 2009, 08:53 PM
Thank You for your Answers:
In fact I am a person who is extremely romantic,so romantic that no normal
person could ever satisfy my need for hugs.But at the same time I also
have a really weak body and I look almost like a woman,so that NO girl
or a woman HAS -EVER- even looked me with anything but hate.And also
the fact that I am a buddhist means that I am too "good" for people who
want dominant "butchmen".I have tried from the age 10-25 EVERYTHING
to get me a nice girlfrind (internet,bars,at jobs),and tried to do it in every
manner but still no one has ever more than slighly intrested(and even they
all had men already).And also I am terribly sick now so that I don“t even
have almost any emotions left(one of my sicknesess is a neurological disease that has destroyed most of my brain so that I dont have more
than 40% emotions left)which also means that I couldnt even have sex
in the way that I now have it with anyone.)
So I have really bad karma wich TOTALLY makes it impossible for me to
have any sex or relationship with anyone,so meditation really is the only
thing that I have left!

-----------------------------
Another help is to be a vegetarian, if you are already not.
---------
Like I said it already I am a vegeterian.

Namaste,

Whatever you say as "I am such and such ----" are imaginations. Meditation alone does not work. It leads to Laya samadhi, if not accompanied by discriminative mind. When you lose body sense in meditation and see only light (or whatever you see), you must be vigilant to seek the one who sees the light.

Continued success in this exercise will only kill your imaginations of which you are full now and which are troublesome.

Om

Jack 999
24 March 2009, 09:11 PM
Namaste,

Whatever you say as "I am such and such ----" are imaginations. Meditation alone does not work. It leads to Laya samadhi, if not accompanied by discriminative mind. When you lose body sense in meditation and see only light (or whatever you see), you must be vigilant to seek the one who sees the light.

Continued success in this exercise will only kill your imaginations of which you are full now and which are troublesome.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------
I am not quite sure what do you mean by that,but:Ofcourse I do not see
myself as any "defenition" when I meditate or am in the at least in the
80%enlightened state.I do not think that I am sick,ugly or weak,I am just
pure consciousness.But it does not mean that I for instance am not sick
so that I could be with people(in fact the best that I can expect from life now when I am so sick is not to kill myself and to live alone(and because
of meditation I do not have to go to a hospital to live where i couldnt even
meditate anymore) or that any girl would want to be with any more.

devotee
24 March 2009, 11:00 PM
Namaste Jack,

Do you know what you or for that matter anyone, including me, are ? This "I" is just a ball of thoughts. We are what we think we are ! That is ,perhaps, what Atanu wants to say. All your opinions about yourself are but opinions, it is not actually you. There are many people who are thin but everyone doesn't think the way you think & everyone doesn't have the problems that you are facing. Why ? Just think about it & it would show you the way.

I have not come across anyone else who says that he is 80% to 90% enlightened. I don't know what this means. How do you measure this level ? Either you are enlightened or you are not. May be you are able to achieve higher planes during meditation.

You appear desperate to have sexual encounters with a girl but carry negative ideas about yourself. Please tell me one thing. When you are not ready to accept yourself then why the girl you are interested in will accept you ? Can you just be a friend of a girl without expecting any sexual favours from her ? Otherwise your demands (even silent ones) will drive anyone away.

The worse thing that I notice in your post is that you have adopted meditation as the second alternative because you couldn't get a girl's attention ! This will take you nowhere. First decide what you want. If you are more interested in carnal pleasure then go in that way. If you have a good nature & good income I don't see any reason why you can't win a girl's heart. Appearance does matter to some extent but is there just one girl in the town ?

I think you need a true Guru who can show you the right path.

srivijaya
25 March 2009, 08:36 AM
Hi Jack,
Your posts raise more questions than I can find answers for. I am sorry to read about your illness - I hope you are getting suitable medical assistance for it. My feeling is that you are basically a very caring person, as your work with children demonstrates.

I am not sure if there is a specific thing you wish to ask about, or merely use the opportunity to unburden your mind.

In any case, I wish you well.

Namaste

Atman
10 April 2009, 04:46 AM
I have been celibate (well not at the subtle level) for over a year. As one guy @celibacy.info bluntly put it;

'wanking destroys the mind, and leaves one feeling empty. One should only use his creative energy for the purpose of children, and used sparringly, at that.'

sunyatisunya
17 April 2009, 10:49 PM
If you're going to refrain from sexual activity, do it naturally. Don't force it upon yourself otherwise you will create so much unconscious tension...

Sometimes it happens that you don't feel much of a sex drive for several days/weeks/whatever ... that's the sort of time when you should consider moving completely into the continent life if you so wish, because at that time you can successfully establish new habits and overcome old ones.

Also be aware that - like eating, if you have too much sexual activity you may become used to it in such amounts and feel a constant need for it. Don't just stop - that would be like going from eating to excess one day and then not eating at all the next. Gradually, gradually, gradually is the way.

sunyatisunya
19 April 2009, 04:09 AM
Some other tips:

If you do masturbate, have sex, or a nocturnal emission -

- Take a shower after
- Take a vitamin pill
- Drink some tea
- Don't avoid your meditation practice - go right back into it even if you feel you've come down.

That's basically what I do. The orgasm is like a violent shock to the nervous system and shouldn't be indulged in to excess. To add to that, semen is rich in vital nutrients to the body and brain. I've noticed that after a dry orgasm I feel no change in my 'level' (or overall health) but after ejaculation I feel drained (literally!), wasted away, tired, lethargic, mentally dull, unhappy with myself. I think lecithin is the main thing we lose through semen and some say it gets reabsorbed back into the body contributing to overall health and mental well-being. So if you find some vitamins with lecithin it might help. There's lecithin in lots of things like whole grain bread but I think it's only small amounts from other products.

sm78
19 April 2009, 04:51 AM
That's basically what I do. The orgasm is like a violent shock to the nervous system and shouldn't be indulged in to excess. To add to that, semen is rich in vital nutrients to the body and brain. I've noticed that after a dry orgasm I feel no change in my 'level' (or overall health) but after ejaculation I feel drained (literally!), wasted away, tired, lethargic, mentally dull, unhappy with myself. I think lecithin is the main thing we lose through semen and some say it gets reabsorbed back into the body contributing to overall health and mental well-being. So if you find some vitamins with lecithin it might help. There's lecithin in lots of things like whole grain bread but I think it's only small amounts from other products.


A note: I have found taoist techniques to help prevent loss of the sexual fluids to a great extent. I don't know any living masters nor I have practiced regularly as I should, yet the difference I found with myself was convincing.

Let me know if anyone else had the same experience. Although hatha yogic exercises are great from many other angles, I don't find them too helpful in this regard. The chinese simply had the better mastery of the actual techniques regarding this matter and Indian guru's as usual have better mastery with words. My feeling and experience.

atanu
19 April 2009, 09:04 AM
Interesting.


Satapatha Brahmana Part 1
SECOND BRĀHMANA

2:1:2:4. On the other hand (it is argued) why he should not set up the fires under the Krittikās. Originally, namely, the latter were the wives of the Bears (riksha); for the seven Rishis were in former times called the Rikshas (bears). They were, however, precluded from intercourse (with their husbands), for the latter, the seven Rishis, rise in the north, and they (the Krittikās) in the east. Now it is a misfortune for one to be precluded from intercourse (with his wife): he should therefore not set up his fires under the Krittikās, lest he should thereby be precluded from intercourse.

2:1:2:5. But he may nevertheless set up (his fire under the Krittikās); for Agni doubtless is their mate, and it is with Agni that they have intercourse: for this reason he may set up (the fire under the Krittikās).
-----------------
Satapatha Brahmana further goes on to lift prohibition from all acts under all asterisms.

Now, coming back to practicality (else SM will be angry) I ask why should married face any difficulty?

If not married, what can a mere ego do to control the rising of Bharga-Agni? One can pray. One can dedicate all acts to Agni. One can take a vow of agni and stick to the vow as much as possible. If the vow is broken, then one can start afresh, after seeking pardon. Finally, one can fast or stick to sattwik food.

These should be helpful tips to me, since I set up my fire wrongly under Krittikās.

Om Namah Shivaya

Explorer
20 March 2010, 10:47 PM
I must say it was a bit funny to see this topic, I already imagined from the title, some poor guy having sex once and then falling limp into a coma for 3 days on the floor :)


I am still a virgin at 31 years of age because I am so much a buddhist that I think that sex is disgusting Isn't aversion in Buddhism just as undesirable as attachment ? Furthermore how exactly do you 'have sex' if you're still a virgin? Very confusing..

Have you had a girlfriend recently ? Or ever ? Do you get out much ? Are you leading a balanced life in general ? (not expecting an answer really, I see the OP only has 3 posts in about a year, but feel these questions must be asked/considered). Siddartha did have a wife, riches and so on, and went out exploring life, so there's probably other stuff to do besides just meditation.


'wanking destroys the mind, and leaves one feeling empty. One should only use his creative energy for the purpose of children, and used sparringly, at that.' Hmm.. if that is true, then I am in some SERIOUS trouble :eek:


A note: I have found taoist techniques to help prevent loss of the sexual fluids to a great extent. I don't know any living masters nor I have practiced regularly as I should, yet the difference I found with myself was convincing.Can you please share some details ? pm, new thread, any way you like :)