Females - Jeans/T-shirt banned at Kapaleeswara Temple, TN

[Viraja]

Vannakkam: Can anyone recommend good on-line reasonably priced clothing stores, for both men and women. Sometimes newcomers to our faith would have no idea where to get Hindu attire, let lone where it. But on-line ordering would solve all that.

Aum Namasivaya

Namaste EM ji

I used to buy 'Salwar kameez' from Cbazaar.com, which is actually based in Chennai where I hail from. The dresses might seem pricey but they do carry a decent amount of dresses as low as $50 with option to have them stitched. I had my salwar kameez stitched by them and was very apprehensive as to the size, but they sent me a perfect one. But it took a full 2 months for receiving their order! I think they can improve in this order.

[smaranam]

Vannakkam: Can anyone recommend good on-line reasonably priced clothing stores, for both men and women. Sometimes newcomers to our faith would have no idea where to get Hindu attire, let lone where it. But on-line ordering would solve all that.

Aum Namasivaya

Vannakkam Eastern Mind

This Web-site lists actual stores by City, State and Zip code.

http://www.courtesyindia.com/usa/Gar/welcome.aspx

Due to the kind of customer demand, a lot of this will be exotic wedding material, but you can always find simpler day-wear in the same place.

However, most major cities with some Indian presence will have a clothes store, grocery store, utensils store all next to each other.

Here is an Indian On-line store - www.junglee.com
I just went on the internet like anyone else would and found this. Seems like a reasonable store. There must be many like these.


_/\_

[Eastern Mind]

Vannakkam:

The two temples (North American) I know that enforce dress codes have 'loaners' at the entrance. I think that's a great solution, but I'm sure us traditionalists are in the minority by far.

Aum Namasivaya

[Jodhaa]

I fully support dress codes for private institutions as long as they are applied equally across the board for men and women. The idea that women should dress a certain way in order for men to be able to control themselves is an insult to men as well as women.

When I first began attending Temple I didn't have traditional clothes, but I used some common sense from my days as a Catholic and I know that it's good sense to at least dress modestly, so I wore long skirts and shirts with sleeve coverage (If it was hot I would wear short sleeves but never tank tops)

I have worn a kurti top with jeans on days I knew I was going to be volunteering to do heavy lifting or dirty work at the temple. I think a balance of practicality and temple appropriate wear can be struck.

[Sonpari]

Namaste friends,
While I totally agree with the rule shouldn't it also apply to the men? And what is wrong with lungi? Is it not a traditional South Indian men's clothing? The SwamiNarayan temple in London does not allow short clothes for both men and women. Once a man had worn shorts and he was given a lungi to wrap around by the temple guys. That is fair enough! Sex angle is a poor argument and sounds like the rubbish that Muslims generally spout. Aren't women supposed to have any sexual feelings? Also, when one is going to the temple why should sex come into the picture at all? Realistically speaking a person can get attracted or not regardless of clothing style. Also pandits, pujaris etc. traditionally don't wear upper clothing. That in my opinion is disrespectful to women as well.
Regards
Hari AUM

[Eastern Mind]

Vannakkam: Welcome to these forums, Sonpari,

In South India, the lungi is considered informal, something you wear about your house. An apt comparison might be blue jeans with dress pants in the west. Jeans are considered a 'lower' form of dress, meant for when one is working. To go out fine dining, to a ballet, to a Christian Church, dress pants are more acceptable. Sp veshti or dhoti is fine, but lungi isn't.

Aum Namasivaya

[ShivaFan]

There are some "traditional" Indian attire that is just as revealing as American attire, there is American attire that is less revealing than conservative Indian attire. There is Muslim attire that is much more conservative and less revealing than the "conservative" Hindu attire.

I do not think it is a question of what country or community the attire comes from, I think it is only a question of how REVEALING the attire is. I think a temple can have a rule about that, that no revealing attire is allowed. It doesn't matter what country the attire, it seems the issue to a temple is how revealing it is.


What attire a country wears or community wears changes over time. Not going topless is actually a modern trend, in Western India and Gujarat we know from temple, cave, and murti "art" that women went topless includung in temples. Most Devi murtis from there, and especially from South India show Goddess with exposed breast but wearing under garmet. So these Murtis were not "naked" and then had clothes put on Them, rather Their clothes were already part of the metal murti itself but they were bare chested, they did not have a sari wrapped over them. I will tell you, those temples which were open to women in those days, the female devotees attending darshan came topless. Some rich had upper garmets, but even the rich were topless too.


Today, I am not comfortable with women if they came topless to the temple. That is because I grew up in modern society in America where that is not acceptable. In Holland, as we see from the paintings of Vermeer, most all females covered their heads like a Muslim. But the pretty faces of girls in his paintings cannot be ignored by most boys.


For me, a beautiful women will be attractive no matter how much she covers her chest or rearend. Those like me see her immediately, her hands and face, feet, and we see right through most any sari or salwar kameez with x-ray eyes and we already know what the girl looks like naked. Maybe that is bad, but it is a fact, we have x-ray eyes and see you as you are unless you are completely covered with a baggy bag thrown over you like some Muslims, but even in most muslim attire, we know.


Today, the modern trend in India is not to go topless. I watch ZeeTV and there are females on that Indian TV where in their sari, salwar kameez et all, there is nothing to guess about and are even more revealing of a rear or breast than blue jeans, and those earrings and gem pulls your eyes purposely to those engaging lotus eyes that, with a cock of the eyebrow say "Do you like it? Me?"...


So if it is about revealing attire, I think any temple has the right to say "no". It is about the "action" of the attire, the "method", the "bait" of the attire, the attraction and revealing nature of it and not if it came from China, Africa, America, India. When I go to a Sikh Temple, I cover my head with a cloth - always. They are there at the entrance for all men if you don't have a turban. Great tradition, the temple has a rule and provides the headgear so all men entering can comply.


Good idea.


If I am working in the Concord California area, and I go to the Saiva Siddhanta temple on 2nd Street there, I go after I get off the job directly, wearing my "Western" attire. Nothing revealing. I follow all rules. They like me, and never say "take your dockers off, shirt off" to me.


The temple can do what it wants. They should always make it clear BEFORE you go in. If head gear for men, make it available at the entrance.

Honestly, if a temple in my area had a rule I must wear a dhoti, no shirt, and tie my hair like a yogi, I won't go anymore. There are lots of temples I can go, otherwise.


As for "shirtless temples", I have been shirtless, but I really am not into it. Sorry.


I find a salwar kameez VERY engaging on a girl. Should I lie? And let me tell you right now, every American boy I have ever had "whisper talk" with looking at "it" liked it, too. They wear in the temples. I see it. I LOVE those spikes the girls in Indian "attire" wear in Delhi. Should I lie? Of course, take those spikes off before you go into the temple.

And my main focus of the temple is always the Murti and the Devatas. Not the girls.


Om Namah Sivaya

[deafAncient]

Very interesting topic! At my temple, I see the full range of dress, men mostly wearing shirt and pants, a few wearing traditional clothes. Quite a few women, maybe half(?) dress up traditionally, and I see all the way down to t-shirt and shorts for some of the girls, though the Temple does request clothing standards. I do wish more of them would dress up traditionally and get the jarring, garish sight of western clothes out of temple (though I'm just getting back on my feet through my writing, and it will be some time before I can get appropriate clothing).

I have a couple of kurtis, but darn it, I washed them first, and they came out a bit on the small side! I don't know if I can stretch them back out. Fortunately, we have a few Indian clothing stores in Houston, where I go sometimes. The vast majority of my clothes, western clothes, are in storage, and I had bought them when I was working retail, so I could get a lot for my money. Fortunately, most of them are outdoor/work type clothes, and I have many years' supply of them. I say they are in storage because I live in my travel trailer, which has very limited room for clothes. I have worn one of two t-tops (better looking than plain t-shirts) over unshaped dark jeans to Temple the entire time I've been there, because it's all I have that is the most presentable (I've lived on the road for over two years now, and I'm semi-permanently settled on a friend's property, but still in my travel trailer).

See, my present wardrobe shows that I fully did not see this coming. I could have spent half the money on outdoor clothes (because I believe in being out in nature and keeping myself in shape for as long as I can) and the other half on Indian clothes. But that was about 5-7 years ago when I did this. During that time, I was enamored with overlanding and traveling to different places, and so I had planned on transitioning my life to doing more of that from time to time and continuing to work for the company, which I left over two years ago. Now, I have all these clothes I will never have to buy again, because I won't live long enough to wear them all out (assuming I can live at least another 30 years or more). Not to brag, but whoops.