Namaskar,

I was surfing YouTube for various bhajans and I came across a video that did something to me that I can't quite explain. All I can say is that out of nowhere I felt the need to fall face down on the ground in adoration. I felt an intense desire to worship. I also felt joy, but it wasn't an ecstatic, overwhelming, "madman" type of joy; it was more like a serious joy, a focused and concentrated sense of happiness. I can only label the experience as "spontaneous devotion" because that is the best way of describing it in my opinion.

I have not felt this type of devotion before. When I go to temple or when I perform personal puja at home, it is almost like I am planning to be devotional or something silly like that, but it has never been so spontaneous and unplanned like it was today. Maybe this is a sign of progress...I'm not sure, all I know is that in that spontaneous moment I knew exactly what my purpose was and all the questions that I could ever ask were immediately answered. On top of this, all desire was lost, except for the intense urge to worship Bhagavan. It was total satcitananda.

I was particularly moved by this experience because I felt like I finally "got it". After years of rigorous meditation and study of scriptures I am finally starting to understand Sanatana Dharma on a new level; it is quite exciting! I am really beginning to see the difference between devotion for show and devotion in spontaneity. There is a major difference in quality here. It goes back to the difference between acting out of the mind vs. acting out of the heart. When something comes from the heart, it is truly a phenomenon beyond words.

I also wanted to say, much gratitude to all of you here who have helped me along the way through your informative and enlightening posts! If anyone else has any input it would be greatly appreciated. By the way, for reference sake, here is the video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wnQI...YUnrJg&index=1

Love & Light to All.

Pranam.

ॐ नमः शिवाय,
LightofOm