I'm new to all this, but you can call me a believer. I'm a 26 y/o Hispanic Caucasian American who has been searching all his life for somewhere he can fit in, and by golly I think I've found it. Many would assume I'm only involved in this due to New Age leanings, or for the sake of exoticism, but no --- I really believe it, and the reason why is something I experienced during a Zen Buddhist phase after bailing out of my own personal cross between Roman and Byzantine Catholicism. Couldn't take it anymore, but that's a whole 'nother story. But during my Buddhist phase I had a sudden experience of ego loss and I found myself feeling like some pure, non-dual consciousness attached to my body wherein all was one. Talk about mind expansion. I could only explain it through the Hindu concept of God, so after a couple weeks of kicking against the goads due to self-consciousness about what people would think of a white guy becoming Hindu I went there. I developed a devotion to Shiva in the form of Ardhanarishvara due to the fact that I relate to the Divine in a non-dual fashion, and because I have a non-standard gender identity. I started praying and putting dharma into practice and found many of my issues that have plagued me for years falling away so easily. I went from miserable to just about normal in a few weeks.
Anywho, that's why I chose this name. I feel I now know it, although the full realization is yet to come.
BTW, here's a poem I wrote during that experience:
On the outside
Inside
Looking outside
And inside
Timeless in time
Placeless in space
Unbound inside of every dimension
Nowhere and everywhere
Unborn
Undead
Eternally Time
Infinitely Space
Nothing and Everything
Lifeless without death
Darkness of light
All is one is all
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