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Thread: Realizing Shiva's Energy and Asking for hep

  1. #1

    Realizing Shiva's Energy and Asking for hep

    Namaste,

    I have been drawn to the idea of Shiva for the last few years. Moment I turned to Him, my life has taken a turn.
    Not that I do not feel low at times and worry about the past and other things but some things are going well.

    2 years ago, when I was distraught about my future, I had the sudden urge to pray to Kala Bhairava on Kala Bhairava Ashtami.
    My Boss at a global company, where I had done a trainee ship called me back and offered me an opening! Things got better from there more or less. I also found a person I would like to spend the rest of my life with.

    But recently, I was informed that they might not retain me. From what I understood, one of the senior managers wants to bring in people from his country blatantly and for that he wants to chop off my connection. I am not sure how much support he has received from the top level people but the main point is that he is adamant about this. He says, the company should do the work necessary and cut off other activities.My Boss is fighting to keep me on different terms but he did say I should look for other things.

    The place where I live is not very open to foreigners and it is close to impossible that any other company will sponsor my visa.I was also counting on my spouse being able to join my on my visa and being able to continue here.It will a mountain task to make sure that me and my spouse will make it back here. My future again seems bleak. I wanted to give my children a good future here. Now, I am scared whatever I built in the last few years will turn to nothing me and my spouse will have to start from scratch. That thought scares me so much and depresses me.

    How can I expect my spouse to find employment here without any standing here.What I do now? I prayed to Kala Bhairava. I don't expect things to turn around in one day but things do not seem to be proceeding well
    What do I do? I have trusted Shiva once and I would do it again but the time aspect worries me as does the future.

    Any insights on developing a deeper connection with Shiva or Kala Bhairava?

    I know I should stay upbeat and hope He helps me but I am not able to

  2. #2
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    Re: Realizing Shiva's Energy and Asking for hep

    Hari Om!

    Just replied to one of your posts from January not realizing at the time that it was so stale. Now I see this and much of the same material that I wrote there applies here as well. Now a bit more but on Shiva ...

    Trusting that you've made headway in meditation since January, please try to focus your attention on the third eye and Shiva's image there. Concentrate deeply on the mantra "Om Namah Shivaya". You will quickly find inner peace.

    How is your sadhana progressing? Perhaps the difficulties are just a purging of some karmas that need exhausting and no more.

    Keep the faith! The answers are at hand. Lords Ganesh and Shiva are watching over you guiding your every step. Pray and trust.

    Om

  3. #3

    Re: Realizing Shiva's Energy and Asking for hep

    Hello All,

    Following on my post above.
    Not much has changed in my situation since 2016. I managed to get another job in a small company. I don't see much of a future here.

    I was still anticipating that my old Boss would bring me back. Now I realize everything I was told by her was a downright lie. I was just used by her to secure a position for her protege who cannot even string a few words to write a sentence in English. She is now trying to promote her based on all the work I did. Now the only thing she throws these small-time contracts she wants me to take up to support their work and surely clearly pass it off as her protege's work. I feel just used by her for her promotion and now to continue her work as her protege is incompetent. In hindsight, everything she told me about my contract at the time might have also been a lie. She might have never have tried to help me.
    I think they have some family or religious connection which is why she favour her. Once in a while, she throws these "Oh you are a part of my family" statements at me which I have learnt to disregard. I was warned several times by colleagues of her nature but she never showed that side to me. And now I see her blatant lies to me.
    The reason my contract was not renewed was because of "budgetary issues". And I saw they had hired someone recently, her comment was that they are not paid much when the reality I know is that the new person is paid as much as I am in new my job.

    She also told me that she has a new position which could become permanent but she didnt think of me because she didnt think I would want to do Assistant type work when in reality the post will be upgraded. Then she offered to remove the person coming in because she didnt like him/her. She kept repeating during this time that I have a good job now and I shouldnt leave it. So she basically wants to keep using me while I work are my current job.

    She is pregnant now. I don't wish her ill but I cannot imagine her true nature was hidden from me for so long.
    She has the right to think about her kid's future but I don't for my own?

    I deserved a permanent job at that company and I worked towards that for years.

    Things are not likely to change. She event spoke to a friend who also works there saying that I shouldn't leave my job and that my Boss went home and cried after my talk with me because of me. I have not seen such liar in my life. What hurts me most is that I was shrewd all my life and I had a turned to God a few years ago and tried to see the best people. I believed that man is eventually good. All that has crumbling down and I have also changed and not for better.

    Even now my boss only intends to use my skills, I just to be able to use this to my advantage and make her give me what I deserve. I believe karma will give her what she deserves eventually.

    But I still cannot believe this treachery. In all honesty, all I want is escape this bubble and get another job in an international organization based here abroad. If I continue to stay in my current job, I will be still dealing with her official capacity as my new company also works with my old employers.

    I want to have a cordial relationship with her and I want to get out of her clutches and fake promises. I want a new beginning and another good job in a big organization here. I am applying here and praying everyday for divine help.

    I am praying everyday but I dont see results. I have started a chanting schedule for 40 days with hope that there will be light under the tunnel.
    Can anyone at this Forum guide on mantra chanting and their experience with it? I would grateful for any insights.

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