Re: What Must Be Avoided During Mourning Period FollowingThe Death Of A Close Relativ
Personally I donít see any restriction going to mandir and performing spiritually activities once the period of Sutak is over. Sutak applies both for birth and death.
One year period, is where the relatives perform various rights for the benefit of the departed souls, I was told by a priest the nearest planet takes nine month to reach. Pindas are offered every month after the initial ceremony of 13 days. These offering is done for a year, in Gujarati we call it varsi.
These days in UK at least due to lack of time or what ever this Varsi is performed and included with the Barmu or the twelth day, when all the pindas up to one year gets offered. I personally like to think if a person who was kind and helpful while living why should he become an obstacle after the departure.
Now coming to not participating in any event be it spiritual or social would largely depend on the loss one would have suffered, how near and dear that person was. One may grieve for years.
It is mainly a taboo to take part in social events, due to respect one has to be seen to give to the departed and to the relatives. in my opinion it is purely Social customs.
Spiritual practice like Sivaratri or Janamastmi there is no restriction that I know off except when one is impure. in fact spiritual practice or vrat are merits that one offers to the departed.
off course the firework at Diwali or playing with colour may be construed as having fun while a departed souls ashes have barely cooled, these are social constrained, as not to be seen as having no regards or respect for the departed souls.
Rules of Sutak
From the Preta-kanda of the Garuda Purana.
The impurity accruing from birth and death is fourfold. The rules of impurity are applicable to all the four castes.
The days of impurity are ten for the relatives on the fatherís and motherís side. People should avoid taking meals during this period with the relatives of the dead. The bereaved family should neither offer nor receive gifts, should neither undertake nor conduct sacrifices. The study of the Vedas and Shastras (scriptures) is strictly prohibited.
One should observe the following while performing obsequies rites; suitability of place and time, sufficiency of wealth, justification of purpose, validity of reason and his capability.
If a person dies in a forest conflagration or in some foreign country, then the impurity is soon removed by merely taking a bath.
If a child is dead in the womb or is born dead (still born), there should be no obsequies rite, no water libation and no impurity at all.
Artisans, architects, physicians, servants (male or female), kings and Vedic scholars are purified immediately.
He who is undergoing a fast (abstaining from food), he who is performing a sacrifice reciting the mantras, he who has set up a sacrificial fire or he who is a reigning monarch (ruler) Ė these are exempt from the rules of impurity as are also those who are exempted by the king.
For impurity accruing from birth, the rules are not so strict. Mother is purified after ten days; father just after taking a bath.
Manu has said that there is no impurity if a person dies during the days of marriage, during festivities, during days of sacrifice (religious ceremonies). The foodstuff prepared or collected for use can be utilised by the persons concerned.
Birth:relatives incur no impurity. Impurity attaches to parents alone. Primarily, it is the mother who becomes impure. Father is purified by the touch of water alone.
In birth or death, impurity lasts for ten days.
By giving food to the hungry and to the poor and the needy, the parents get rid of impurity the sages have declared.
Man is purified after bathing in water from an earthen jar, mixed with gingelly seeds and clay from holy places.
He should give gifts of some articles to the village assembly (local community organization). Wealth should be given to a Brahmin.
A person distanced by seven or eight generations or he who has not undergone the Sacrament incurs no impurity.
For men who have lost their lives for the sake of (protection of) Brahmins, cows, women, or in the battlefield, infirmity lasts for a single night only.
Brahmins do not incur impurity if they are engaged in auspicious rites. Those who arrange cremation of an orphan child with a Brahmin assisting them in this act become purified as soon as they take bath.
Jai Shree Krishna
Rig Veda list only 33 devas, they are all propitiated, worthy off our worship, all other names of gods are derivative from this 33 originals,
Bhagvat Gita; Shree Krishna says Chapter 3.11 devan bhavayatanena te deva bhavayantu vah parasparam bhavayantah sreyah param avapsyatha Chapter 17.4 yajante sattvika devan yaksa-raksamsi rajasah pretan bhuta-ganams canye yajante tamasa janah
The world disappears in him. He is the peaceful, the good, the one without a second.