Namaste,
Thank you for your reply.

Just to clarify a few things

-Im in the UK, I live just outside London, near a place called Slough and in a place with a large Asian, Chinese and muslim population. There are mosques and mandirs and buddhist centres, and its even becoming more commen to find white poeple in islamic or asian traditional clothing.

- The mandir I go to requires that traditional dress - including vaishnav tilak be worn when doing service around the temple -something i do on a weekly basis.

- Ive always been something of an alternative dresser. On my very first visit to an Iskcon temple I was wearing a floaty sari skirt, kurti top and scarf over my head, with bangles and a bindi. Its the way i dressed for years. I dress in long skirts and kurti tops because i feel more comfortable and modest in them than jeans and t-shirts.

- I do wear a few strands of tulsi mala and because of the style of tops I wear - they are on show most of the time but i dont go out of the way to wear huge chunky ones or anything. I think that by the time ive a nose pin, tulsi mala, long skirt and t-shirt/ kurti top - i look like a devotee one way or another. its the whole look taken together rather than the fact that im walking around in saris or punjabis or something.

Im used to people staring at me for how i dress ( i was a goth for many years - piercings - black make up - the works ) and that doesnt bother me. And i dont mind standing out as being a devotee - nor do i feel the need to stand out as a devotee..

most indian people i come across are very accpeting - and think its nice that a non indian can appreciate their culture - but the problems I have come from the ''white'' camp so to speak.

The job where i work is a call centre - and people are always going out for after work drinks or meals etc which i dont join in with. Where ever possible i try to keep explanations away from anything religious but it gets hard to keep coming up with excuses without seeming rude or unsociable or getting too personal about my beliefs.

Sometimes i do find it easier to at least say im religious and leave it as ambiguous as possible - but its when it really gets down to needing days off, or when there is a big event on - like at christmass - or when the odd joke goes past about hare krishnas that i feel like my faith just isnt taken seriously - because im white.

I often feel that things get said to me that wouldnt if I was indian or in a headscarf or something..

once when i complained about the situation- i actualy had a manager blame the problem on me and my skin color.

Ironically - my work also has a number of hijabi muslims at work - and ive actually ended up finding myself a whole bunch of friends in them - just because on many levels we understand each other - even if our core beliefs are very differant.

Im really just wondering how people deal with this kind of attitude in every day life ? I dont feel that its fair that i should have to go out of my way to hide my beliefs but im not one to push it in peoples faces. I do strongly believe in dressing modestly and wearing tulsi and chanting etc but i dont walk out of my house trying to dress like i just fell out of some indian village - just so everyone will think im cool..

sorry again - for such a long post. I hope again that you understand what im getting at here ?