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Thread: Love and Marriage

  1. #1
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    Love and Marriage

    Namaste,

    When will people learn that marriage is only for pro-creation and not for love?

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-india-18824367

    Pranam.

  2. #2
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    Re: Love and Marriage

    Vanakkam,

    "Yeah so womens got harrassed, let's make forbidden to her communication devices, freedom to go where they want, and put some burka on her ! Oh, also, let's ban happy loving couples from here. It's not funny if they don't cry when we marry them by force!"

    Yup, there is no islam invasion. People just act more and more so stupid that they actually look like muslims.

    I am sorry but I think this situation id awful. What's next ? Putting all womens into garbage bags and hiding, locking them in closets like in pakistan ?Yes, this will sure resolve all problems, it's well known that a good man id never in fault when assaulting a woman. Just look in middle east what's happening, killing womens and poisoning young girls in their schools...such holy mens!
    Sisters from Bharat, rejoice! They will save your souls !

    EDIT: TALKING ABOUT HARASSEMENT CASES FEATURED IN ARTICLE, NOT ABOUT MARRIAGE. Sorry



    Aum Namah Shivaya
    Last edited by McKitty; 14 July 2012 at 12:41 PM.
    ~Aum Namah Shivaya~

  3. #3
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    Re: Love and Marriage

    I saw this short documentary yesterday on the methods followed in Kyrzistan to marry off their women. The land is a central asian country sandwiched between Ujbekistan and china. People have mongoloid features and they are all muslims. The women are literally abducted, thrown in a van, taken to the cleric and are married off against their will. Some abductors filmed the said abductions in real time and shared the footage with the documentary producers. Thus we get to have a first hand experience of the ordeal ourselves. We see the women wailing, tossing around to free themselves and trying to run away, a bunch of men hold them, pin them down and literally carry them to marriage hall and a white veil is placed on their heads before the ceremony. The whole experience is shocking, the commentator repeats that it is illegal and against the religion to perform forcible weddings. But then the people and law enforcement look away all the time. World is a tough place to live in I guess.

    Of the 6- 8 or so types of vivaahas (weddings) described by the Hindu scholars, the above one is termed as RAKSHASA vivaaha.
    By the way, police have arrested the village elders who have passed the diktat. Namaste.

  4. #4
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    Re: Love and Marriage

    Namaste,

    I made the post to show how some old fashioned people in isolated pockets make up some unenforceable rules - something to laugh at. Such people have no backing from the society at large and are normally drummed out of town in no time. I wish the forum members would not take it as a serious piece of news, or as a representative act of the life in Bharat. People, learn to laugh a little at the silliness of kooks in our society!

    Pranam.
    Last edited by Believer; 14 July 2012 at 08:31 AM.

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    Re: Love and Marriage

    Vannakkam B: Where are the silly cooks? I'm in the mood for some silly food.

    Regarding marriage, this was also the way in rural Alberta when I grew up. In fact, my own marriage was of this variety. There was no other way. I was far too undisciplined and odd-looking for any serious considerations. My Real and Imaginary brothers all went to town and captured her. But contrary to this story, I believe the two Fathers also exchanged money at the local pool hall, although I'll never know in which direction the money went.

    Aum Namasivaya

  6. #6
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    Re: Love and Marriage

    Namaste EM,

    Make that 'kooks'.
    But contrary to this story, I believe the two Fathers also exchanged money at the local pool hall
    Our village had not yet caught on with the concept of currency at my marriage, and the deal was made through the exchange of 50 goats and 25 bushels of corn.

    Pranam.

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    Re: Love and Marriage

    Quote Originally Posted by Believer View Post
    Namaste EM,

    Make that 'kooks'.

    Pranam.
    Vannakkam: But if a kooky cook could cook kooky cookies, what kind of kooky cookies would a kooky cook cook?

    Aum Namasivaya

  8. #8
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    Re: Love and Marriage

    Namaste,

    The kooky cook would cook kooky cookies with the kooky dough, and they would be just perfect with the afternoon tea for some of us kooky HDF members who are discerning enough to always shop for kooky cook cookies.

    Pranam.

  9. #9

    Re: Love and Marriage

    Pranams,

    Just to clarify for the judgemental outsider, "love marriage" here I think refers to those couples who arrange their own marriages after courtship, as opposed to the traditional system in which Hindu parents arranged the marriages of their children based on caste, family compatibility, and examination of the other side's qualifications, etc.

    It's easy for Westerners to poke fun or liken it to Islam, but the fact remains that this was the standard marriage custom in human society for centuries and is still practiced even today by modern Hindu families. In the scriptures, we find that most marriages were also arranged in this way. Note that I did say "most." The concept of a "love marriage" is hardly a more enlightened institution, as the nearly 60% divorce rate in the United States should indicate. Not to mention cases of date-rape, partner-abuse, pregnancies out of wedlock which go on almost as an everyday thing.

    This class of cultures is the direct result of the invasion of superficial, sense-gratification-oriented, Bollywood-style culture. Real marriages require similarity of values, tolerance, and the support of parents on both sides. These things are not considered by people merely following their hormones and feeling intoxication with their freedom. In the Hindu context, there must be piety and a shared responsibility in the need for performing the obligatory householder sacrifices and other duties. Without this, the gRhastha ashrama degenerates into animal life.

    As much as I think their rules will not have the intended benefit, I feel sorry for these village elders who are trying desperately to hang on to their culture. Although it is officially the case that no one should be looked down upon for practicing his culture, it is unfortunately the reality that condescension and scorn of Hindu customs is still socially acceptable even among Hindus themselves. Unfortunate.
    Last edited by philosoraptor; 14 July 2012 at 12:29 PM.
    Philosoraptor

    "Wise men speak because they have something to say. Fools speak because they have to say something." - Plato

  10. #10
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    Re: Love and Marriage

    Vannakkam all: The evolution of the marriage system is interesting to watch, at least. I think one that was never there before, but is becoming more and more common, is internet matching. Westerners sick of the dating scene are using it, with some success, too. One son and one daughter of mine found a match that way. With a definite mix of eastern and western values, they didn't really know which way to go. My son, an environmentalist (non-practising-Hindu) vegan part computer geek certainly wasn't having much luck anywhere else. They met on a local vegan chat group, and seem to be a really decent match.

    My daughter was just really sick of the dating game, unable to look anywhere to find a suitable match, and every guy seemed to be an immature nutcase. So she went to a matching site, and after some extensive searching, found a non-drinking decent shy guy. She wouldn't have found him any other way.

    I am all for arranged marriages, given the cultural circumstances, and the willingness of the potential spouses. I've seen several work out fine among my friends. One of the problems for a couple kids I know was the inability for the parents to get up and get after it ... so it wasn't the kids that were against it, it was the parents unable to do a decent job of it. One son had had enough of the waiting around, so went and found a love marriage, which initially really upset the parents. "Well, Appa, you weren't making an effort, so what was I to do?" The parents have since come around. But I know 2 others in the same circumstance who are now in their mid forties. Too late by many standards.

    I'm against sight-unseen forced arranged marriages for economic (read immigration sometimes) reasons. I think it's inhumane, and unethical. All the arranged marriages I know have had the persons involved having final authority to say yes or no.

    Love marriages work well too, provided both parties are mature enough to handle the responsibilities that go with it, and this is sometimes a biggie. Immature people should grow up first.

    Aum Namasivaya

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